June 14, 2008

DOG VETERAN INVENTS HORSE DRAWN TANK



In an effort to stop troubles overseas, a group of veteran dogs from the Civil War joined to create what they understand is the ultimate war strategy-- combining the rustic wagons of the Oregon Trail with today's modern tank. A group of soccer players passed the tank during a game, they shared their opinions:
"The tank was alright, I learned that someone has to be exposed the entire time while using the machine, to guide the horses and all. That was kind of cool."
“I asked the horse how many bullets it could fire, he didn't know. Piece of garbage shit horse."
The armies patiently await the arrival of these mercanaries, as the dogs make their way from Colorado to Iraq. Enthusiasts are concerned that the horses will tire swimming across the ocean, but the dogs are confident in a swift, uneventful journey. The name for the weapon has yet to be determined. Last we spoke with them it was a draw between "Horsey Tank" or "Tanks and Horses, like an Eagle with Butter."
-Hal Cronweld