True American Dog: Barfy Scorpion

June 14, 2008

NEWS ALERT - DECEMBER 2

Barfy Scorpion lands a babysitting job.

Star dog sells his dumb frame collection.

Vampire breaks neck at dance party.

NEWS ALERT - NOVEMBER 24

Barfy Scorpion kills horse-- attaches saddle to dog.

Vampire found at dig site-- property value soars.

Dog commended for using turn signals.

NEWS ALERT - NOVEMBER 22

Couple names dog Adolf-- dog takes it too far.

Blind Dog loves Barfy Scorpion's jokes.

Eagle teaches internet course for horses.

NEWS ALERT - NOVEMBER 18

Barfy Scorpion gets laser eye surgery.

Undercover dog dies when attempting to act kewl.

Dog arrested for using murder blanket incorrectly.

DOG, EAGLE, HORSE, AND BARFY SCORPION ENJOY HALLOWEEN

Celebrating their fifth Halloween this year, dog Lincoln and his friends took the streets for a night of mischief and tricks. The theme for their costumes was 'heroes and food' which allowed them to many possibilities for amazing costumes.

"Oh they were so darling," says Blanch Piscataway, "I almost threw up when I saw that scorpion dressed in his sandwich outfit. But then he threw up, it was so cute!"

"Will Smith was a good choice," says Farmer Trevington, "horse dressed up as a hearse last time for their theme of murder, it didn't go over so well. He told me he wanted to be MIB Will Smith but he couldn't hold a gun in his hands with his bag of candy. Plus eagle wouldn't dress up as Tommy Lee Jones.

Eagle had no control of flight and ended up drowning in a tree; and Lincoln finished Halloween in jail after destroying nearly 400 pumpkins.

-Hal Cronweld